I have moved thirteen times since leaving my childhood home at nineteen. I am now twenty-four. Last year I moved eight times alone, which was what led me to consider: What have I been chasing? What does home mean? What is it supposed to look like once we grow up, step into the chaos and confusion of adulthood, and start paving our own paths? It was that wondering that wooed me into writing this book.
This story seemingly starts with an impulsive move to a city I barely knew. It looks like the beginning of a grand, spontaneous adventure of learning to make a home in a city I hadn’t spent longer than 48 hours in. But in more honest language, it’s a sacred story that’s been writing itself over the two and near-half decades since I was born. It’s a story that starts in the rockiest of rock bottoms I have ever experienced, all fears and insecurities brought to the surface, being pulled out from beneath my mask. It starts at my tipping point, and each chapter presents layers after layers of how I began to put myself back together again. How I learned who I am, what I need, and what I deserve.
Within each draft that I have written, erased, started over, almost published, and started over again, I have realized that this quest for belonging that I’ve been on has looked more like a journey to find myself. A journey of learning how to love myself well.
I’m not here to try to teach anybody anything. All I have is my story and my experiences to offer, but I believe that is worth sharing. I'm writing this in hopes that maybe somebody somewhere can see themselves in my story as well. I think that's the secret, that's what people search for so long and hard in art, movies, music, and literature. People want to know that they're not alone. As a writer, I think part of my responsibility is to remind them of that.
If you decide to read my story, just know that it’s going to get really honest. It’s going to get really messy, awkward, raw, and real. But real, that’s what we want. Let’s take off our masks, and together, learn what we have to offer this world. It’s time to take our power back.
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