Can I "Love My Body" and Still Want to Lose 50 Pounds?

I remember standing in front of a mirror propped up onto a fading purple theater chair and drawing lines on my body with eyeliner. My performance art classmates, ten undergraduate students all taking this class to fulfill the art requirement at our small liberal arts college or to live a weird, narcissistic dream, all watched as I choked back tears marking the bits of my body where I wanted my silhouette to end.